A few days ago, I was talking with a friend who owns a much larger business than mine. While we spoke, he noticed a problem in one of the back rooms where furniture is prepared for display and sale. A large, all-leather lounge chair was sitting deserted but still covered in intense, wet, leather cleaners, which had now pooled up in spots. This caused the cleaner to concentrate - over-cleaning the pooled zones. Think of it as big bleach spots in the leather.

His cleaning man had wandered off, leaving it in this state.

I left the boss to his business, and later he caught back up to me. He was shaking his head, and said "You'll never believe this one!"

"I searched the building... and I found him. He was in the bathroom. A buddy of his dropped by for a visit. While he was cleaning the lounger, they decided he needed to take a break, so he just walked away from the chair, leaving it as we found it. He and his buddy were sitting on the men's bathroom floor - tossing dice - for money...

I jumped down his throat, and told him he'd better get the chair fixed."

I asked "Gonna fire him?"

Boss shook his head and laughed: "HE - THIS guy - is my BEST employee!! My BEST!!! What am I supposed to DO???!!!"

I started laughing because he was laughing, but this wasn't funny-funny, it was pathetic-funny. Laugh or cry funny.

I said, "Sometimes I think I'd like to have my business up to this size, but maintain the FUTURES quality. You remind me THAT is impossible."

They are contradictions.

We both laughed... because we didn't want to cry in public.