Except for a rush-job to the P.O. yesterday, I did what I
said I would: stay home. And, I did get things done.....
a few things, anyhow. I'll take it. Thus is Life. I'll take it.

Life is no longer so simple or singularly focused that I can
enter my day believing I will have cleaned my slate by the
exit. That began slipping away from me during Grad School
as I not only continued creating Art, worked numerous jobs,
and taught, but began a national search for a Professorship.
I could feel the 25 hours jammed into my day. My life was
more complex and simpler during the days of Professing,
and I was learning that something had to give. I had no
clue how to proceed other than by saying blatant things
like "No" ...but it was a start. I believe empathy for my
students began teaching me how to better treat myself.

Once I went through the series of higher stress situations - the
next university job search, taking instead the public school positions,
marrying, step Daughters, my lower back making me a cripple, and the
very late discovery my source of Depression was another body failure, I
had no choice but to reevaluate what each day could - and COULDN'T be.

The Mind was very tough on the Body. The Body failed me a number of
times in its adult years, and none of it due to its age. The Mind got us
into this, the Mind would have to get us out. Saying "No" was only
sometimes the right answer... "Yes" was also a correct answer.
Sifting one from the other was the trick, and to this day it seems
like an ever-mindful challenge.

How DO we take care of ourselves? Is it through the defensive
acts of "No", or is it also through the offensive acts of "Yes" (he
asks rhetorically)? Editing isn't as difficult anymore. My slate is
always full - even when it doesn't look like it - and it's full of what
only I can see as the healthiest Balance I can chalk up for 24 hours.

If this is what comes with age - and it seems to be - then bring it on.
I don't want to go back.